THIS IS PISSING ME OFF!

Hi guys. I'm the first guy, by the way. Sorry about the confusion, we'll post our names from now on. I'm Mark, by the way, Mark Greenman. Anyway, let me start by giving you guys a little bit of info I've learned about Purgatory:

IT SUCKS!!!!! I mean, I ran for miles through an empty city before I figured out that this was actually PURGATORY! Then, I had to run all the way back to the health club/purgatory headquarters. Once there, I went into the locker room, locked myself in the stall, and screamed my head off. Eventually I lost my voice. Didn't matter, because apparently no one TALKS IN PURGATORY!!!!!!!!!! I mean, after that old dude told me where I was, no one talked to me. They just sit in chairs, swim like turtles (I'm trying to be P.C., you know what I'd say), and DON'T TALK!

Another piece of info: Somehow, we do get internet in Purgatory. Ask me how, my answer will be, "Do not know, bugger off!" The only thing is, this internet has the speed of dial-up divided by ten! It's slower than death. It literally took me ten minutes to connect to this page. I guess cross God-land internet is pretty slow. Anyway, I needed some way to get my emotions out without destroying my voice (again), so I blogged to you guys. Thanks for listening!

Info #3: I checked the blog later, and discovered that other people had posted to it. I read their posts, and got really, really, MAD! So, when I went to purgatory, I had to get hit by a bus (that's just my guess, not actual, proven fact) to get to Purgatory! I had to die! I'll never see my friends again! In return, I get to watch old guys swim in a frickin pool for all of eternity (with this attitude, I don't think I'll be "moving on"). The "others" seem to be able to come and go as they please. Well, HOW NICE FOR YOU! I hope you're reading this, other people, because if I see a kid sitting by those windows telling me "Welcome to Purgatory" I will slap him until he cries! But, since I've never seen them, I'm guessing that they're in a different Purgatory. Lucky them!

Have a GREAT LIFE, cause I won't!

-Mark Greenman

P.S. "Others," please sign your names when you post, even though the readers could probably differentiate between my uncontrollable rage and your "sense of adventure."